What is Family Mediation?
Mediation means standing in the middle or using an impartial person to do so. In the conventional legal system in Australia and many other countries, if you have a dispute with someone, you hire a lawyer to fight tooth and nail on your behalf. It can get nasty, and it can get expensive, but people often don’t care about the effect it has on the other participants, who are simply the adversaries and must be beaten.
In family matters there are feelings to consider: husbands and wives can become ex-husbands and ex-wives, which is bad enough, but children, for instance, are innocent bystanders, while brothers and sisters and other close family members are your own flesh and blood, and if a resolution can be achieved without damaging them, so much the better.
Mediation involves talking about the issue and finding a way of resolving it through reasoning and compromise. There is a saying in the business world that a good deal is one in which everybody gains something, and while that may not always be possible in family matters, surely it is something to strive for.
Mediation has often been used in international relations, when conflicts between countries have escalated beyond the means of traditional diplomacy. The presence of a benign mediator with no personal axe to grind has helped powerful figures to defuse situations where one of the chief complications is the fear of losing face. Persuading both parties to work towards a settlement by looking at the bigger picture has saved anguish and suffering on a huge scale, and it can do the same for families in situations that may mean nothing to the outside world but are everything to the individuals involved.
What is Not Suitable for Mediation?
While most things are eligible for discussion and reasoning, domestic abuse and personal safety issues clearly cross the line and must be treated with the strictness of the law which permits zero tolerance. Another area which can make mediation less than suitable is where there is a significant discrepancy in the power balance, so that one party is liable to be steamrollered by the other.
What Not to Say in a Mediation Meeting
There are no rules but simple guidelines, with the obvious starting point being that everyone should avoid aggressive behaviour. The whole point of mediation is to avoid unpleasantness as far as possible, and if both parties set out their case clearly and undramatically, trusting the mediator, the scene is set for a productive process.
Mediation can demand a certain amount of selflessness, making concessions that potentially leave us vulnerable, but our skilled mediators are trained to monitor this and encourage fairness and reciprocation. They are on no one’s side but both parties’ side, promoting reason and humanity. The concept of “being the bigger man” can open doors and result in huge relief for everyone involved.
What not to say in a mediation meeting, then, is anything inflammatory or provocative. Keep it civil and reasonable and trust in the process.
How Much Does Family Mediation Cost in Australia?
There is a cost, of course, because mediation involves the time and expertise of a legal professional. Suffice it to say that it is considerably less than going the traditional legal route, where even initial costs can be quite sobering and a drawn-out case can result in daunting bills being incurred.
Although there is no standard charge for mediation, what we can offer is a free quote which takes into account the complexity of your case and how much time may be needed to come to a successful conclusion. With the best will in the world, if you engage a law firm to resolve your issue without going to court, that is the closest you’re going to get to family mediation in Brisbane free of charge. And you will enjoy a hefty saving in cash and emotional energy.
